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But I'd been testing out various sexual wellness toys for more than six years to no avail. Figuring out which is the best vibrator really comes down to which areas of the body you like to have stimulated. There are external styles that stimulate the clitoris and internal styles which massage the vagina and g-spot. If you want external and internal stimulation at the same time, there is also the rabbit vibrator. This has a vibrating vaginal shaft and external ears which vibrate against the clitoris so you can get the best of both worlds. You can get a big dildo, a mini dildo, a metal or glass dildo, a textured dildo, or even a curved dildo to directly target the g-spot.

If you use latex condoms, use a silicone or water-based lube like Sliquid Sassy or Uberlube — oil-based lubes degrade the integrity of the condom and create microscopic holes. Whether you’re using it alone or with a partner, throw a new condom on that bad boy every time it’s about to touch a new person — specifically a latex, polyurethane, or polyisoprene condom. "You can also get a yeast infection, bacterial vaginosis, or urinary tract infection from a sex toy," says Stubbs. While there’s been no research on the topic, STIs that spread through skin-to-skin or genital-to-genital contact can also be spread via a sex toy.

It’s large, yes, but lightweight compared to other body massagers on the market today. Other clitoral stimulators Melissa recommends include the Lelo Sona Sonic and Clitoral Suction Toy to avoid penetration but still experience pleasure. "If penetration has become painful, these are a great way to slowly and gently reintroduce penetration into your sex life at your own pace," Melissa says of this three-piece dilator set. Redefining pleasure in midlife can require a little homework, Melissa says, adding she often tasks her clients with a short quiz to help them explore what they desire now. "I have worked with women who are in their late 50s who are having the best sex of their lives because we worked on their mindset first and foremost – we know the mind affects the body so we start there," Melissa says.

We tried the 6, which is similar in shape and size to a fountain pen. Unfortunately, we found the toy’s vibrations to be a bit buzzy compared to those of the rumbly and similarly shaped We-Vibe Tango (see below). And the Ultra Power Bullet 6’s handle vibrates to an unpleasant degree. The Aer is extremely simple to charge and operate (one tester described it as having "zero learning curve"), with a magnetic USB charger port at its base and three buttons on the top of the toy.

If you want truly excellent vibrations, sometimes you have to level up your sex toy cache. This gorgeous wand has a body made of aluminum and titanium that looks sleek and offers deep, rumbly sensations. Sure, it's hefty and needs to be plugged in, but it's one of my favorite high-end vibes because its power and beauty are practically unparalleled. Toys made from non-porous materials don’t absorb germs and are easier to keep clean.

Unfortunately, the suction feels somewhat weak